Fem-anger Unfold-019
Introduction
The idea of an “expiry date” for women’s dream is a social construct and should not be considered a valid or legitimate concept. This article aims to clarify who decides the expiry date of a woman’s dream? Dreams, aspirations and goals are personal and individual, and there is no pre-encoded age at which they should expire.
Why women’s dreams become impervious?
Women’s dreams become impervious in this patriarchal society, because this is the only reason that judges a woman’s accountability in her life. There are many which contribute to the impervious dreams. It can be divided into 2 main factors on the whole as the answer for the question “why women’s dreams become impervious?” those are,
- Internal aspects
- Externals aspects
Internal aspects
- Lack of interest
- Laziness
- Self doubt
- Assumption that women are meant to work for her partner and children
External aspects
- Lack of social support
- Bad financial condition
- Opposition from family due to fear
- Selfishness and dominance of their partners
Dreams also gender biased?
In history, men’s desire for the power and dominance, driven by their ego, has often overshadowed the marvellous creative supremacy that women possess. Man-made laws always have flow and for that reason it is changing gradually. I don’t think, even if it is biased, someone decides the expiry date of women’s dreams.
No one has power to decide about expiry date of women’s dreams except that woman itself. If a woman decided that she doesn’t want to pursue that particular dream so that is the end. So, obviously the individuals can decide the expiry date of one’s dream. Women have the right to dream, to love, to be liberated. We have the right to choose the dreams that we need to chase on. It doesn’t matter where we are from; it is our dreams, whatever the dream may be we decide it.
Societal expectations are barriers
Societal expectations and stereotypes sometimes suggest that women should achieve certain milestone by a certain age, such as getting married, having children or pursuing specific careers. However these expectations are not universal and individuals should be free to pursue their dreams and goals at their own pace and on their own terms.
Society and tradition play a role in fixing on the expiry date of a woman’s dream. It is common in many marriages that the women are required to stop socialising with people. This leads to isolation. Marriage should not be a relationship of captivity for their dream.
Patriarchy wins
An Indian marriage sabotage women’s dream. She is expected to look after her family and to bear a child within the first year of her marriage. Priority shifts. She will be thinking that her dream can wait. She has to be a care taker to her family and children. If she gets a job promotion in a different city she is made to decline the offer for the sake of her family. Men are never subjected to these adversities. But, who decides the expiry date of a woman’s dream?. If the women who are at fault, or is it patriarchy?
A statistics shows that they tried to get stories of husbands who had agreed to change cities for the wives’ career and dream; they did not get one such case in such entire country. Think of the other way round. Women constantly up their dreams on hold or at the back seat and encourage the growth of their husbands.
Women with dream have to be an intrepid
A common mistake most women make is that they never talk to their partner before their marriage about their dreams and passion. It comes with a lot of changes and uncertainties for her dream. We live in a society where a man may have a dream without the support of his wife. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work like that for a woman.
A woman is capable of destroying all the labels that settle on as a roadblock to reach her goal. Being a lady of the house or working women, life inevitably holds a bag full of jerks as well as hurdles for them to travel. The issues that a working woman face is a higher than a home maker. It is because she has to harmonize both dreams and the personal life.
If she has to practice her genuine dreams she has to fight in opposition to her family and the society. Successful women are those who have broken the norms of the society. Though many factors like age & family affect her, they are merely the obstacles in the path of dreaming, and making it come true. The right paths are those which have obstacles. It is essential to challenge and question societal norms that impose arbitrary timelines on women’s lives.
Women should not afraid of the labelling like “arrogant”, “not a good woman”. Women should not drop their dreams in order to maintain their approachable, accommodating and easy going status in the family and society.
Conclusion
Who decides the expiry date of a woman’s dream?. No one can determine the expiry date of a woman’s dream. But the individual themselves can determine. Dreams and aspirations are deeply personal. The genuine dreams can be pursued at any stage of life. Women can value the norms of the society and their family’s traditions but never let then constrain you, make your dreams a reality. Women with dream have to be an intrepid. A genuine dream never expire. It always remains.
-Writer.jerl.
(Contents are authoress’ own)